Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Michelle on November 22, 2010 at 5:46pm

Hey Ash....thanks a lot for the compliment! I appreciate it a lot! I don't do anything with my poetry or art..it's a difficult think to do.

Anyways....I haven't read all of your poetry yet but I do have to say your very first one untitled was amazing...love the word play. It seemed to be very heart felt!

Here's a couple I wrote not long ago

Versions of Lost Expressions

Drifting again
serious as
a star will dwindle
as the candle does burn
so brightly,mesmerized
by such a daunting glow

Preciously sinister
in building a hope
no longer so out
of reach

lost expressions
that won't complete
unraveling before my
eyes
lovely and earthbound
this time with
an intended wonder


Lost Fire

In the cold
I wait for you
longing for your fire

In the dark
I await the truth
alone forever
without your fire

Now I meld a wedge
in my heart so deep

So deep

In my heart
I can no longer
feel
no longer can
I feel anything
for anyone anymore

Unreachable in my solitude

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Ash on November 24, 2010 at 12:12pm

Thank you too, and I wasn't really expecting anyone to read all of em' yet......I did put a lot up lol. I don't mean to pry but, what keeps you from sharing your work? I'm not really questioning you here, just curious. I know some people find it difficult because it's the equivelant of putting your heart and soul out piece by piece, with the possibility of someone criticizing it. In other words, criticing the very person you truly are deep down. That being said, to me at least, that's a hard thing to handle. But there are places like this forum where people can express who they are regardless of our flaws, insecurities, and any wrongs we may have done in our lives we regret. It's an oppurtunity to let those things go and find yourself through it. That's why I like reading others "work" here, because in a way, it's like someone sitting down and letting you know things they would otherwise, find next to impossible to say face-to-face. It makes me see people in a more positive, perspective sense and appreciate others. Sadly, not many people in this world express themselves this way, much less take the time to find out who they are, what's important in life, and what life itself is about. Omg, I did it again lol. Sorry, for going on another tangent. Back to the point, I love "Versions Of Lost Expressions" and "Lost Fire", I get a sense of "light and shadows" from some of your writing. Err, what I'm desperately trying to find the words for is that it incorperates the light and darkness within us and around us, things like the light of a candle, hope and despair,the moon and stars.............I hope that made sense lol. But I feel those seem to be natural elements people take and give form to in some way because, when it comes down to it, isn't everything caught in those two elements? Light and dark, good and evil, that kinda' thing. Our actions themselves play out to either side, although, I'm sure I'm not the only one who has days where they feel their in a gray zone and indifferent in a way. Drifting through both as we can seem to drift through life at times, thats what the opening lines of "Versions Of Lost Expressions" brought to mind. Shit, going astray again! Okay, I gotta' stop now, so keep up the writing, hope to see more of your work up. Ah, and before I forget.......has anyone ever told you that you look like Tiffy, The Bride of Chuckie?
Michelle said:

Hey Ash....thanks a lot for the compliment! I appreciate it a lot! I don't do anything with my poetry or art..it's a difficult think to do.

Anyways....I haven't read all of your poetry yet but I do have to say your very first one untitled was amazing...love the word play. It seemed to be very heart felt!

Here's a couple I wrote not long ago

Versions of Lost Expressions

Drifting again
serious as
a star will dwindle
as the candle does burn
so brightly,mesmerized
by such a daunting glow

Preciously sinister
in building a hope
no longer so out
of reach

lost expressions
that won't complete
unraveling before my
eyes
lovely and earthbound
this time with
an intended wonder


Lost Fire

In the cold
I wait for you
longing for your fire

In the dark
I await the truth
alone forever
without your fire

Now I meld a wedge
in my heart so deep

So deep

In my heart
I can no longer
feel
no longer can
I feel anything
for anyone anymore

Unreachable in my solitude

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Ash on November 24, 2010 at 12:26pm

Damn, you've definately got your own strong visual images and wordplay going on. A solemn dark piece.....love those kinds for some reason. "A tale and a trick", "A twitch and a fix", I have no idea why but those lines a pretty unique. "A fly in the tea" as well, what do they mean? The whole thing was great so that's no kind of criticism by any means. Oh yeah, I was wondering, is Fall your favorite season?

Ghost-Child550 said:

Thanks Michelle it's good to be here, especially seeing all the new poems from everyone :)

Well here's my latest piece, tell me what you think.

A Shade of Blue

piercing shadow light
wind claims the soul
frightened
alone
afraid

i refrain this has gone too far
her eyes visions from a dream
remind me
the cold whispers
the rustling leaves
telling secrets
chattering mouths
open wide

a tale and a trick
a fly in the tea
but why
what can you see
nothing
no more

inward cry
sly smile
the rain makes life
and life drinks soil
and blood is the wine
the boy that i was
smiles
to the girl that i had
where has she gone

a trickster
seeks resonance
for sound reason
eyes glazed over
from what
a toy train
with batteries run dry

seeking solace
in dream
fails the heart
and fells the soul

a twitch and fix
no room for
question
no tea for peace
no animal
on the leash

and where was i
i was nowhere
lost in the cry
of my own beating heart

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Ash on November 24, 2010 at 12:43pm

Ah damn it, I just noticed what poem of mine you were talking about. I don't know why that cam out as untitled cuz' it should be 'Ritual'. I'm not sure if that was a version before a bit of editing or not but here is the one I THOUGHT I put up.

Ritual


He holds it in another day
Bitter lonely words he can't say
Stress and anger cloud his mind
A hopeless soul longs for truth it cannot find

To cope with sadness he must face
He goes into a quiet place
Breaking the silence of his heart again
He purges the rage with ink and pen

Cutting out the pain with every word he writes
He bleeds it onto solid white
For all the tears he shed alone
He gives a testament to every one

For all the guilt and secret shame
He makes the words reflect the same
Nevermind the hands of the clock
His heart is what tells him when to stop

His emotions drained to the very last
He's given it all he has
The burden lifted when the truth is said
He finds a place to lay his head

9/17/10'


Michelle said:

Hey Ash....thanks a lot for the compliment! I appreciate it a lot! I don't do anything with my poetry or art..it's a difficult think to do.

Anyways....I haven't read all of your poetry yet but I do have to say your very first one untitled was amazing...love the word play. It seemed to be very heart felt!

Here's a couple I wrote not long ago

Versions of Lost Expressions

Drifting again
serious as
a star will dwindle
as the candle does burn
so brightly,mesmerized
by such a daunting glow

Preciously sinister
in building a hope
no longer so out
of reach

lost expressions
that won't complete
unraveling before my
eyes
lovely and earthbound
this time with
an intended wonder


Lost Fire

In the cold
I wait for you
longing for your fire

In the dark
I await the truth
alone forever
without your fire

Now I meld a wedge
in my heart so deep

So deep

In my heart
I can no longer
feel
no longer can
I feel anything
for anyone anymore

Unreachable in my solitude

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Michelle on November 24, 2010 at 2:20pm

Lol.....no one has ever told me I looked like the Bride of Chucky before...but thanks...I think. I don't really know where to begin to get my work published. I love the way you express your feelings and ideas. Have you been published before?

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Michelle on November 24, 2010 at 3:49pm

Here's another new one


Atmosphere

Clouds, silver-lined
with a twist of Malevolence
in this space
with these listless stars
reigning over all

An obstruction
yet still an enlightenment
breathless in this
atmosphere
floating in this dust
breaking apart
with a reality
that is not
my own

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Ash on November 29, 2010 at 1:29pm

Thank you luv, and nah, never been published. Never came to mind really now that I think about it. I'm in the same boat as you on that one, not too clear on where to start. Hmm, one way might be to send in your writing to a local paper, I know some people get noticed that way. I'm not sure how appealing that is to you, I'm not too sure myself lol. That or find some publishing company online or something like that, the most direct method I can think of but I guess you have to consider who you want to publish it too....I think I'll check that out myself actually. Haha,then again, since we're on this sit maybe you could send LP a message asking if they know of any good ones? By the way, 'Atmosphere' was awesome. Short and full of powerful imagery (at least in my mind). I love dark, cloudy days so it gets points with me lol.

Michelle said:

Lol.....no one has ever told me I looked like the Bride of Chucky before...but thanks...I think. I don't really know where to begin to get my work published. I love the way you express your feelings and ideas. Have you been published before?

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Bobby Jack on December 11, 2010 at 10:50pm

ttt

 

It's a little..mainstreamy sounding kinda.. but I like it, newest song, hit me with whatcha think, peeps. Would be appreciated :)

 

Too many people in this world left feelin' cold
Shut down in the walls you've built around your soul
Somebody told ya how the world was
And they never realized, it was their own world
You can't learn that way
Or your mistakes will follow ya to the grave

Sometimes when things get tough
And every heartbeat full of love
Is just not enough

Live your life to the fullest
But always remember that tomorrow
is just a day away
See the colors on the horizon
And remember God's many gifts
Like color in symphony

Step outside of the box
And see the colors of life
Every shade means somethin'
To someone
Somebody's gota find the shades that make ya happy
If that someone is you,
Ya better get yourself back on your feet

Sometimes when things get tough
And every heartbeat full of love
Is just not enough

Live your life to the fullest
But always remember that tomorrow
is just a day away
See the colors on the horizon
And remember God's many gifts
Like color in symphony

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Michelle on December 13, 2010 at 8:02am

hey Bobby...nice work I really enjoyed the line "Like color in symphony"

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Harriett on December 15, 2010 at 6:34pm

I haven't been here in forever! Pretty good stuff you guys have been posting lately, I spent a lot of time catching up and enjoyed what I read. Here's one of my latest pieces. I've been trying to find inspiration to create, which can be really difficult at times. It's easy to get caught up in everyday craziness. But usually I make it difficult, because I expect all my efforts to be prefect instantly, which is insanity. Most artists are perfectionists...I'm trying to rid that type of thinking. It sucks the fun out of art and turns it into a grueling laborious task that has to be done.

 

 

Pretend

 

I cross broken trees

Impenetrable to the November wind

Pretend, my favorite game

The only I know well and

Felt like playing

 

Hell, Hilary Duff and

Avril Lavigne work well

As if they know or gave a damn

That I was borderline

As if my mom gave a damn

 

I have thirty minutes or not

She's already sorry, quick

As if I was ready to pack and leave

I'm ready to pack and leave

Never understand

 

As if they gave a damn

That I'm ready to cross borderline

I no longer have

Thirty minutes but

Forty-five and counting

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Harriett on December 15, 2010 at 6:46pm

Ash, you are such an amazing poet! You definitely could get a book out there. Your writing skills make me jealous...I can totally relate to a couple your pieces. Doppleganger was my favorite and Deepest Black is pure beauty. You have so much wisdom and talent...people like you make me lose self-confidence in my art. I looked at your profile too...I love Ghost In A Shell :)

Ash said:

Now that I'm fully in the mood I might as well put up a few more.


FIELDS

Silence now
Upon these fields
Where the wind has come to lie


Whisper soft, if you must tell
Of secret days past in golden twilight
Here with me forever by your side


When night passes overhead
Dearest friend, don't be afraid
The silent moon will light our way
Safe to sweetly dream far from howling wind


As dawn breaks as we wake
Our secret place of evergreen bathed in gray
Through Heaven's clouds upon Earth we wander into day


Silence now
Upon these fields
Where the wind has come to lie


Hand in hand
Come walk with me
In these fields where it’s just you and I

4/13/09



Deepest Black (Four Voices)

A shadow has been cast over the world
To darken every soul of any light
The veil is pulled over truth
It seeks to devour the very Sun
A voice like the winds blow within its wake
It whisper's softly within the ear
Its voice is clear to the open heart
"Heed the voice less heard"
A cry springs forth from Earth
Carried by the seven seas upon the land
It laments of suffering, death, despair
Its voice is loud upon the Sons of Man
The many people scattered about
For all their business with naught
Dust settled between the ears
The Third shall catch them unaware
The voice they raise of ignorant pride
Pleasure and greed consume their minds
As the foundation of societies lies begin to fall
They shall carry on, though the truth exposed to them all
And so it comes, subtle and great
A deception garbed in the guise of salvation
Blinding their willing eyes in darkest light
The shadow descends upon a fallen world
Whom heeded The First flee the shadows wrath
They bear a light that hopes for a coming day
So their blood is shed to feed the Beast
Who fears the coming First and Last
To the few in search for a reason
To seek what's beyond our shattered world
A wind is blowing through the land
Take these words for a breath of that air, and understand
We follow the many in fear of rejection
But the road to what’s right is followed the least
To you who feel you wander this world alone
Who sees an unbalance in the midst of it all
Be not afraid, we are one in the same
Stranger's lost in an uncaring world
The many will come and call you to join
If you should falter, when their words give you doubt
Look past their eyes to the truth of their hearts
An intent contrary to the good of their deeds
We carry a light within our soul that God shares
And so you shall see theirs is a deepest black
9/30/10'


Masochism of The Soul


All alone
You and a conscience
What did you think it would come to?

Don't you hear the raven's above
Black sky of infinite wings
Singing the dirge laying you to rest

The incubus in your soul
The past is what you create
Constant regret

Bound by chains of guilt
Desires thought to set you free
A slave to your own darkness

Sins wrought under the moon
Kept hidden from the sun
Secrets lie in silence but so long

Bear the scars on your heart
Keep this voice in mind
Relinquish, confess, liberation

The gift laid to waste
This ephemeral existence
Eternity waits in forgiveness

Drifting in disbelief
Succumb to the coming tide
Drown a victim to your iniquity

Look again to the heavens
Know their unfathomable endlessness
To deny a realm greater than the cage you've been confined

The cosmos, sea, wind, the breath of life you take
The dawn, twilight, love, the certainty of death
Simple in their nature, beyond 'wisdom' of man

Take your petty pride of life, breathe your last
To die in ignorance, unknown beauty of truth
A fate even Hell shall pity

10-8-10'

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Michelle on December 15, 2010 at 7:52pm

Nice job Harriet although I'm not a fan of Hilary Duff or Avril...lol I like the title mostly

 

here's one I wrote not long ago let me know what you think of it

 

also I thought I'd add that I wrote it to go with a painting I made titled  'A Tiger's Pale Echo'

 

A Pale Echo

 

She’s a whisper
in the sky
a soft winged
creature taking
flight before
this evenings night

Fierceness in her eyes
as if mentioning
her name
would bring
an endless
mystery to
your story

When she sleeps
she dreams
like a tiger
on a winters
blustery evening
but her roar
is a pale echo
in comparison
to her
hearts lovelorn
kiss

• ▶ Reply

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