I thought about a lot and after seeing a movie was when all of a sudden, my life since I have reason so far hit me like a jumble of images and memories, which have made me think of everything, is like if this film was something of my life, and there is a phrase I found that says life is a beautiful and magnificent film in which one must be the protagonist, but after the unhappiness, disappointment, you become just a spectator, as if you were not living what debieses, that it happened to me and know I'm tired of that, it's as if destiny, the divine forces or the universe itself was against me, but the truth is that not. The one who was always against me was me, myself and I just put the shackles, I and only I did it all go to waste, from what happened to my father's nephew to what is now just being 7 days of my 23 birthday, I have gone through difficult things, and even more difficult to me, not like I always said, the universe is just above us through the clouds, does nothing for you to get in problems, he is and always has been the spectator, who shits of laughter if you make mistakes, mistakes that idiot or ... were caused by me.
And the sentences do not stop coming to my mind, say by more than one run of the more tired you will be when they find you when they reach you, and know it's true, I fled from my problems from 7 years, and I think that despite having spent 16 years and I'm still so irresponsible, immature as a person then I wrapped in a white sheet and I just let go. I have heard from many people who admire me because I am strong in adversity because they want it and because I am a person who never gives up, they know that's a lie, I really am ... a child of 7 years in a and adult body.
The life of a child is easier, and if I say yes, evades my problems and give them no importance, and since then have accumulated, that coupled with output error after error ... many but always took the wrong, and today perishing that can look back all my memories and experiences I have given a resounding blow, as you say can be as simple as seeing a movie, which is often written by someone seeking only to make money as is that with that I have noticed everything. Well I do not know, I can only assure that the end of the film, spent 16 years at once, 16 years that I missed, in which I was the viewer, even I can not say I'm a mature person, or I've matured , as this can only be achieved with experience, no one even though it is the oldest man is mature is anyone can appear so, and can claim to be mature, but be sure it only suggests something that really is not so .
To everything and I think I rely on what I see on TV, good and bad situations I most want, anime, and I found one sentence that says something like ... the wisest man world are not sure what it says, because he who claims to be sure something is an idiot, and if you have previously sailed eh said idiot flagged, and if it is better, but one thing is seen to be quite another and I realized that not only looked at ... I really am an idiot ...
Trying to change just bring me problems, I can not change overnight, nobody, least of all should I change so that others think they care about is my life and make it a kite ... not that bad ... for that I am as I am in the middle of nowhere, looking back I saw 16 years which was a whole person mind useless because I did nothing, I never defended in this life and would have liked, and after every fight or argument, come to me as the perfect forms of challenge, but it happened, I can not do anything, now the film, spoke of destiny, as 4 years can change, and there was something there that said, " for four was not the right time, nor just was not ready "... I think and think about it, and then I wonder ... When is my time? ... When the time came right for me? ... I say this for many aspects of my life, school, work, love, and the latter is a taboo in my life ... always love but never getting that feeling back, only now ... but it seems that is not the time, stand situations and only time will decide how to proceed .... another phrase ... "Time is the greatest friend, best adviser" ... but look at death is also a friend and only shows up when you die ... then while happens, because it is slow or because it makes it quick, because it gives me the advice I seek and listen .... I do not know ... I think I will continue and no ... no ... wait ... I'll look these responses must be somewhere.